I’m Going Granola On You People!

Okay, so some of you have heard the news and others haven’t. Starting Monday, February 1st I will be going Vegetarian for ONE month. Before you all start with your two cents and opinions and “What the heck are you thinking?” let me tell you why. This is part of a Facebook challenge/dare from another Army wife. (We Army Wives do some CraZy things.) It's not for suffering animals or fish that are in overcrowded tanks! I really started thinking about how healthy in general vegetarians and vegans are. I lost 20 pounds 2 years ago on Weight Watchers. It’s a great program, don’t get me wrong. It worked, but you can still eat “junk” and stay on plan. One of my New Year’s resolutions for 2010 is to eat healthy and limit the number of processed foods I eat. So, by going veggie for a month, I’m starting fresh and teaching myself healthy habits without the junk. Then I’ll incorporate my chicken, fish and lean meat back into my diet. That’s if I want to after a month of going vegetarian. I’m doing my research. I’ve got a 12-year Vegetarian and a 4-year Vegan in my corner helping me out and one fabulous friend, Tiffany doing this with me for the month.

I’ve been hit on the head and called Crazy, my friend Jelly is upset with me and all because I want to eat better. I’m just trying a different approach to eating better and people act as if it’s the end of the world. So, this blog will not only have my on-going humor to keep you entertained, but you’ll get a kick out of my adventure going veggie. :)

Just to let you all know, I’ve opted for the healthy Lacto-Ovo Vegetarian variety and I’m not going to be eating PB&J sandwiches with potato chips and Oreos for an entire month. Cross your fingers and wish me luck!

Sesame Street Characters and Their Un-healthy Habits

Facebook Fun in the Morning

Ellie: nothing like 2 cups of coffee, a political debate, and Sesame St to start off the day! Yikes!



Nikki: I ♥ some Sesame Street!

Ellie: Elmo is my hero!


Nikki: I'm a Grover girl! Fuzzy & Blue!


Tiffany: What's up with the snuffalupagus? You know he has to snort cocaine the way he's always sniffling and his eyes are so red...I'm just saying...


Nikki: Don't be Snuffy bashing on here! He has allergies!


Ellie: ha ha!


Tiffany: Really Nikki? He's had those "Allergies" for an awful long time I think it's time for Snuffy to take a little trip to the Sesame Rehab!


Nikki: I've often wondered if Cookie Monster is high and Grover on crack with the waving arms all the time? What's your opinion?




Tiffany: I think Abby Cadaby is the dealer she's always waving around that magic wand and strutting her stuff!


Nikki: LOL Good Theory! Where's Bob and Gordon when you need them to set everyone straight?




Tiffany: Out behind the schoolhouse with Mary Jane!




Nikki: Is that Betty Lou's cousin?




Tiffany: Who's Betty Lou? I'm so confused! LoL I think it's "Puff the magic dragons" cousin...

Nikki: See. This is her.
muppet.wikia.com
Betty Lou is a young girl from Sesame Street, and has been variously played over the years by Jim Henson, Frank Oz (in the game show "Pick Your Pet", where she's called Lucy Jones), ...

Tiffany: Oh yeah! I remember her! LoL Probably one of the Hoochies!

Nikki: LOL

Cryptic Text: Had to eat ‘margaret’ on my bread and about threw up thinking about it.

Has anyone read that email going around about the difference between butter and margarine? My sister, Mande sent it to me and I no longer have margarine in my fridge. There are just too many if-y things about margarine. Here the link to the story. Please read before proceeding, if you want the full effect of the story behind the Margaret on my bread.
http://www.truthorfiction.com/rumors/b/butter-margarine.htm

However, while on my romantic weekend getaway with the husband, we ate at this awesome place, The County Line. For an appetizer we ordered a ½ loaf of homemade bread and with it came some honey –flavored margarine. I about threw up thinking about the butter vs. margarine email while eating my delicious bread. I told my sister via text message about the bread and margarine while waiting for my flight. My 12 year old niece, Emma was texting for my sister while she drove the kids to school. (It’s illegal to text and drive in NC.) This is what took place.

Nikki : (via text in Texas) I had to eat margarine at dinner and about threw up thinking about it.


Emma (in car with her mother, Mande in NC) – Mom! Aunt Nikki sent a message.


Mande – Ok, read it.


Emma – (reading) Had to eat MARGARET at dinner and about threw up thinking about it.


Mande – WHAT?


Emma – Had to eat MARGARET at dinner and about threw up thinking about it.


Mande – Ate what Margaret?


Emma – I don’t know. That is what it says.


Mande: (thinking) I’m driving racking my brain to try to remember if we have the word Margaret “code” for anything.


Mande- Are you sure it says Margaret? Give me the f’ing phone.


Emma –That’s what it says. Here.


Mande – OH MY GOD Emma, learn how to freakin’ read. It says margarine! Why would your Aunt Nikki eat Margaret?


Emma – I don’t know. Sorry.


Mande – Geeze, child. I love you. Get out. Have a good day.


Emma gets out of the car and walks into school.

Mande-I call you (Nikki) a short time later on to talk to you about eating Margaret at dinner.


......And that’s how I ate Margaret on my bread at dinner, according to my pre-teen niece.

Mowing Down the Elderly to get to your Husband at Terminal 1.

Okay, so Granny caught a flight from ATL to SAT. I saw her on the plane about 5 rows up from me and Mohawk Baby. She was a cute granny. Well, until I mowed her down in the breezeway at gate A13. I drank a whole Diet Coke while in the air and then hitting some “turbulence” didn’t help my bladder. And I was excited about seeing my Husband. All I hear is “Marshall, they’re running me over! I told your cheap ass to buy First Class tickets, but NO! You didn’t!”

I quietly laugh while I was half-ass running up the terminal to hug my Husband. I hope Granny’s return flight was upgraded. Or I’ll be mowing her down again on the return flight to Atlanta.

Mohawk Baby and Skyy Vodka flying into SAT from ATL

So, as I flew from Atlanta to San Antonio and had a 2 hour layover in the biggest freaking airport. I got see the cutest little boy (well, not as cute as my two) with this Mohawk. I just couldn't take my eyes off this child. He was about 18 months and traveling with his mother. Maybe I was fascinated with him because I was missing my boys, but he kept me entertained during my flight, along with Celia. Okay, here comes the snack cart down the aisle. So, Mom orders her Diet Coke, Skyy Vodka, a $3 can of Pringles and free cookies, while Mohawk Baby is asleep in her arms. As a Southern-born person and raised in a state that doesn’t sell alcohol before noon on Sunday, I take interest in the people who drink before noon. Mind you, that we left Atlanta at 10:48am, but we have an hour time difference flying into Texas. So, it’s really about 10:15 in the morning as these people start drinking when they’re able to push the snack carts out. Just about 5 minutes later, Mohawk Baby has just woke up and looks a little parched from the flight. Whoa…he reaches over and finishes off Mommy’s coke and vodka. Let’s just say that Mohawk Baby is a pleasant child the remainder of the flight. And really people, I don’t make this stuff up. It really happens.

*Disclaimer: This photo is not of the actual Mohawk Baby. Well, it might be at 1 month old.

Leaving for the airport! This should be fun!

Leaving for the airport! My in-flight educational reading material is the book entitled "Stop Dressing Your Six-Year-Old Like a Skank: And Other Words of Delicate Southern Wisdom" by Celia Rivenbark. This should be fun! So, I’m just about to fly for the first time. I got some advice at 3am from a friend in California about my flight and to take some deep breaths. It worked. I didn’t throw up in my pocketbook. I was worried about that. I can deal with blood and guts and even watched a thoractomy for crying out loud. Are you wondering about the thoractomy? Chest tube insertion…Google it. Very bloody and involves a doctor or nurse practitioner inserting their finger between someone’s ribs, into their lung and inserting a tube in that hole for drainage.

Okay, so on with the story. I did well. I remembered my friend’s advice and now I LOVE flying. So, the second leg of my flight, no window seat like the first flight to Atlanta, I’m stuck between two gentlemen and I'm staring at Mohawk Baby. So, in the midst of getting comfortable in the coach seat, I pull out my book. Yep, Celia Rivenbark came along to Texas with me. Girls from North Carolina have to stick together. I sat there reading and about to die laughing, because of this book. My two gentlemen passengers thought I was CRAzY! (Random laughing in an airplane doesn’t sit well with others.) I tried to stifle my laughs, but GOD BLESS Tiffany for giving me this book. I needed it. I was an emotional wreck. I was excited to see my husband. My legs shaved for the first time since Christmas Exodus. I missed my two boys, who I left in the capable hands of my sister-in-law. All these emotions and here’s Celia making me laugh like all get out! (It’s a Southern phrase.) All while being entranced by the Mohawk Baby across the aisle. Then I think back to my first flight of the day and remember looking out the window. There on the wing of the airplane, it says "NO STEP AFT". I immediately begin laughing with no book in hand and think, "Well, no shit!"

If you experience writer's block, just travel.

Okay, so I did my first plane trip and did it solo. I traveled to Texas to see my husband for a weekend getaway. It was wonderful. I know I’ve been slack on blogging lately, but I’ve had some writer’s block. Good news! No longer will I have writer’s block. All I have to do is travel. I have more topics to cover than I know what to do. Here’s a sample:

Leaving for the airport! My in-flight educational reading material is the book entitled "Stop Dressing Your Six-Year-Old Like a Skank: And Other Words of Delicate Southern Wisdom" by Celia Rivenbark. This should be fun!

The Cute Mohawk Baby and Skyy Vodka flying into San Antonio (SAT) from Atlanta (ATL)

Mowing Down the Elderly to get to your Husband at Terminal 1.

Crazy People in the Park and Creative Panhandler Tactics. (rolls eyes and say’s “Not today.”)

San Antonio Riverwalk Michelob Ultra Mud Parade & Did she have a half-eaten hotdog hanging out her mouth?

Airplane rides are like a giant rollercoaster ride and “Look at those cotton ball clouds!”

This hotel is so fancy, we’ve got L-shaped sheets from Hollywood.

I don’t remember much about The Alamo, but that building over there was in Miss Congeniality.

I walked 14 miles and didn’t know it.

I saw the world’s largest cowboy hat –but decided against taking a photo incase I was shot.

BTW-Did you know our hotel is haunted?

Segway Tours for the Rich & Famous

Cryptic Text: Had to eat ‘margaret’ on my bread and about threw up thinking about it.

Haven’t seen any Pants on the Ground in San Antonio….must not be any fools here.

Eye rolls in Texas via NC.

This dude just picked his nose on the plane for 40 straight minutes. Wonder if he’s in the gold mining business?

I can drive from the airport to the house in 45 minutes. Is that too fast?

Sesame Street Characters and their un-healthy habits.

Hope you all enjoy the next blogs featured. I might have enough here to publish a book. Thanks for the encouragement from my fellow Army Wife for continuing my blog, when I though all hope was lost. I enjoyed every minute of my trip and can’t wait to return to San Antonio.

Trying to Go From Semi-Hoarder To Semi-Simple....

My husband and I were talking on the phone the other night, like we do most nights. I told him of all the plans I had to de-clutter our home before we move to Destination Unknown. I told him of area of the house I was working on. (He’s so proud of me.) Anyway, we talked about how bad of a pack rat a used to be. I’m talking on the verge of being featured on a TLC special for Hoarders. Seven years ago, I was slowly becoming “Madame Trash Heap” from Fraggle Rock or “The Junky Lady” from the Labyrinth. If you don’t remember watching Labyrinth with David Bowie wearing tight pants and scaring young children because of the tight pleather/leather pants. Yikes!
Here’s a excerpt from Wiki:

The Junk Lady encounters Sarah after she wakes up from the dream invoked by Jareth's peach. The Junk Lady tries to distract her from her quest to find Toby, as Sarah has lost her memory after eating the peach. She leads Sarah into a junkyard-like version of her own bedroom, giving her an array of toys seen earlier in the movie to be treasured by Sarah. After reading a passage from the "Labyrinth" book, Sarah realizes that the Junk Lady is not real, but an illusion created by Jareth- and that the former treasures of her selfish childhood are not important to her anymore, but merely "junk" compared to the importance of her friends and Toby. She then remembers everything, and discards the toys, at which point the room and the Junk Lady both disappear. Sarah is immediately reunited with Ludo, Sir Didymus, and Ambrosius.


So, I’ve come a long way. I’m getting better at letting things go and no longer need an intervention. I eventually want everything to have a purpose and a place in my home and my life. I just want to simplify. (Slowly, but surely I’m getting there!)


But, I hang on to jobs like possessions. I’ve gotten burnt out on the hospital and my husband and I had already talked during Christmas Exodus about me leaving there at the end of January. I needed to call and talk to my boss and submit my 2 week notice today, so it looks good to the next employer and on my resume.


However......Tomorrow is my last day at the Baptist. My boss was nice enough to back date my 2 week notice, so it looks like a gave one. :0 I’ve got a pretty cool boss and a great recommendation on a job resume from working at a major medical center in the South.


 And this is why.....


(last night’s FB status)


Nikki.....thinks someone really wants her to fly down to Texas for a long weekend. Wouldn't that be nice?


(this morning’s FB status)


Nikki....It's amazing that if you update your status about thinking of catching a flight to Texas for a long weekend, you get a call from your boss at 7:45 am making sure that you're coming in to work tomorrow! LOL


After a lengthy conversation with my boss this morning, (15 minutes) he understood my dilemma. I’ve been a single parent (temporarily) to two boys under the age of 4 for going on 5 months, a long distance relationship with an injured husband, and just a bit stressed feeling like I don’t spend enough time with them because of my other part-time job and the boys going to school during the week. My family is the one thing I’ll make all the room in the world for. So, I’m de-cluttering my life in 2010. If I haven’t enjoyed it, seen it, touched it or worn it in the last 6 months or going to in the next 6 months, it’s gone. However, there are two exceptions to this rule: my skinny clothes in the closet and my Husband! (deployments are 12 to 15 months long)
Goodbye Clutter!

Master Suite Makeover....Phase One

I spent a wad of money at IKEA last week. Thank goodness my husband didn't see the total, he went to get the car. I did purchase a really great find. The toy storage thing I wanted for the boys’ playroom was sold out and I ventured into the "AS IS" department. I found a red end table marked down to $9.99 and paired it with two cute yellow chairs for $12.99 a piece. Super cute and it's a game/coloring table for the boys. The majority of my purchase was on bed linen for mine and my husband's bed. We've had the hardest time finding something not floral, not striped and not too masculine. We finally decided on solid gray bedding with off-white sheets and paired it with a new fluffy duvet. Now, the curtains I bought, make the room. The curtains have tiny orange dots near the "leaves". For $14.99, I have two awesome panels of fabric and after their hemmed, I’ll have enough for two small pillows, two tie-backs and possibly a bolster pillow.

I’m all smiles, because this is the first time my husband and I have splurged on ourselves. Our bedroom finally looks like an getaway, really fancy and grown-up for us. The first two years we were married we had tie-dyed bed sheets, complete with matching comforter! I just need to put some finishing touches on the room. You know, new furniture, pictures on the wall, and a cute orange throw pillow to make the room have a ‘pop’ of color. The picture will be an enlargement of me and my husband on the beach at sunrise taken at Christmas, that is, if the photo enlargement kiosk at the stupid Super Center would stop auto adjusting the orange colors in the sunrise. Arghhh! Anyway, I have looked for my simple orange throw pillow….$39.99 for a 12x12 square. Are these people crazy? I can’t sew, but come on! Forty bucks for a tiny orange pillow and good luck finding an orange bed skirt that’s not metallic orange or part of a Tennessee Volunteers bed linen set.

It might be 2025 before my bedroom is the way I want it, but I know that by the end of next week I’ll be sleeping on a 5 inch thick cloud from heaven on my bed. I got another surprise gift card from the Sears Heroes At Home Gift Registry and I splurged once again on me and my husband and did some online shopping. He won’t be getting much use out of the new IKEA bed linen, fluffy duvet or the soon to arrive plush fiberbed mattress topper, but I will!

What do you know about Chicken Tractors?

So, my Burpee catalogue came in the mail this week. I love fresh produce, but don’t care for the prices some times. I’ve wanted for the last several years to have a garden and harvest my own crops. Yeah-That never happened. So, I try and purchase local produce during the summer. Farmer’s Markets are just fun for me to visit. I enjoy looking at flowers, plants and vegetables, but I do not have a green thumb. Anyway, my Dad and I were looking at the catalogue and began making plans for a small garden with the basics: TOMATOES, PEPPERS, CUCUMBERS, SQUASH, ORKA, and a few others. We also talk about getting other family members to join in with the garden. Then I randomly mention the price of eggs going up and how one of my friends at work built a chicken tractor. I had very little knowledge of what chicken tractors were until I googled it.(Google is a useful tool and now a verb-It’s what you do!) They sound like tiny tractors that chicken ride on. WRONG! My Dad made mention of my own brother building his own chicken tractor, but failed to complete it when his daughter was born. She’s only 6 weeks old, so he’s not that far behind on it. So, I have dreams of a spring season filled with freshly tilled earth, small budding plants, ripen vegetables on the vine and clucking chickens here at the Compound. (My family with the exception of my oldest sister live in a half mile radius all on family land.) I’m not going to hold my breath for this to happen, but it’s something to pass the time.

For you own free 2010 Burpee catalogue, follow this link:
http://www.burpee.com/ancillary/catalogrequest.do

My Kids Can Jimmy a Candy Machine. What Can Your's Do?

The other day, my sister Mande and I were at a used book store with my two boys, ages 4 and 2. We're in the store, browsing around and didn't have a stroller to contain my two-year old. The book store had the 25¢ candy machines everywhere. I didn't have any change and my oldest wanted some candy. I told him no and we'd get some later. I have my youngest by the hand while in the store and my oldest following closely. Lost in the book, I begin to hear the sound of something hitting metal and chomping sounds. I looked down, the boys have managed to jimmy the candy machine for free candy. Candy was now spilling out onto the floor and what was left in the tray was being gobbled up by the boys. Now, if anyone could be more proud of their kids it would be their father at this exact moment. I'm scrambling around on the floor picking up "dirty" candy and trying to get it before it goes in my youngest child's mouth and laughing, because my oldest still is getting candy out of the machine and feeding it to his brother. And then I hear my oldest say, "Mom, I don't like these Skitties, can you get me some Nim & Nims? This machine doesn't have any in it."

New Year Resolutions....

So, 2009 has come and gone and there wasn't a set list of resolutions that I made last year. I've been thinking for the last several weeks what I wanted out of 2010. It's not a fancy or over-the-top list, just some realistic goals that I think are doable in 2010.

1. For Clay to get his post assignment in the Army, so we can be together as a family again.
2. Start an Adventure Book with my husband. Very similar to a Bucket List, but we could include our children in on the fun. (Watched the movie Up and loved it!) If we're going to be moving around with the Army, might as well have some fun.
3. Not going out to eat at a restaurant that will cost more than $25 for my family. I've been so disappointed with restaurants lately. For what I spend going out to eat for a nice dinner, I could cooking something that tastes better at home, have great service and enjoy a bottle of wine with my husband, not just one glass.
4. Stop eating processed food...well, cook with fresh ingredients more often.
5. Lose weight. (That's on every one's list, isn't it?)
6. Go to the gym at least twice a week. (I'm not trying to push my luck.)
7. De-clutter my house.
8. Have a positive outlook on everything. Thanks for the advice CrAzY BaCoN!
9. Cook with my sisters from Julia Child, Martha Stewart and Paula Deen cookbooks. Follow my other blog and join in our cooking adventures.
10. Have more patience with my children and make them laugh and smile everyday.

There it is my TOP TEN of 2010. Nothing fancy, just realistic goals. Hope you all have a great New Year!