The South

\the 'sau'th\, noun

The place where...

Tea is sweet and accents are sweeter.

Summer starts in April.

Macaroni & Cheese is a vegetable.

Front porches are wide and words are long.

Pecan pie is a staple.

Y'all is the only proper noun.

Chicken is fried and biscuits come with gravy.

Everything is Darlin'.

Someone's heart is always being blessed

Toto...We're not going to be in NC anymore?!?!

Fear not loyal blog readers-I have not abandoned you, I just found out a few weeks ago that we will be relocating to............................KANSAS.

Yep, the "Hurry Up & Wait" is FINALLY over and we're moving to America's heartland of ruby red slippers & tornado drills. My blog posts might be few and far between in the next few months until we're all settled in. But, none the less, you will enjoy the tales of my cross country journey, the good, bad & hilarious from the east coast to the middle of America.

My feelings on the whole issue are well....how do I put this?

To put it frankly, I feel like I'm being banished to a third world country.

(You're thinking-"Seriously, she's feeling banished?!?! What the ham sandwich?") Oh, but I am! I've done my research on the area of Kansas that we will be moving to and there's NOTHING there. It's true! The closest Sam's Club is 55 miles away, 2.5 hours to the closest Whole Foods or Trader Joe's or anywhere else I do my shopping. I'm leaving behind Cheerwine (God's gift to the Carolina's, however they do ship to our new zip code), a 4 hour drive to the beaches of North or South Carolina, Southern hospitality and our family & friends.

My Mom is having a difficult time with her "baby girl" leaving (yep, I'm the youngest child), she was secretly hoping for my husband to be stationed in NC or along the east coast, but sadly we're not. We're moving 1100 miles away.

However, as in the name of the blog itself

How to Turn an Average Day Into an Adventure

that's what we are planning to do.

So, hang on and be patient, because you're going to hear tales of my family's crazy and amazing cross country adventure. But, first I'll leave you with a bit of fun from Wal-Mart.

Merry Christmas!

A Year in Status....

My favorite status of 2010-
(a prediction or God's sense of humor, you decide)

What's the deal with the tornadoes?
I don't live in Kansas!

*click on the picture, another window will pop up and enlarge the text

Sharing funny tweets that made my day!

RedHourBen Ben Stiller
RT @thesulk: I'm glad people can't see my blank stare on the other side of their hug

funnyordie Funny Or Die
Morgan Freeman's voicemail greeting must be incredible. (via @brianlaaane)

And finally a tweet from the other night-

Homemade pickled jalapenos=clear sinuses & indigestion from hell. Chugging #pepto by the bottle.

A reply from Pepto the next morning-
@nikki_rumm Check back of bottle or Pepto.com for indications, warnings & dosage directions. Plz tell us more @1-877-894-4976 (M-F, 9-6 EST)
My reply to Pepto-
@Pepto I took the recommended dosage. Thx for your concern on my tweet from last night & my health & safety. #Pepto is awesome! :D
Additional Tweet-
Loves that #pepto is concerned for their consumers health & safety on the correct dosage. :D
Reply from Pepto-
@nikki_rumm Thx for letting us know! Hope you're feeling better today! Yup, we've got you covered!

LOL Awesome huh? Yay! Pepto-Bismol!

* Pepto-Bismol @Pepto Cincinnati, OH
Pepto-Bismol® is the only leading brand of medicine that relieves five stomach problems such as heartburn, nausea, indigestion, upset stomach, and diarrhea. http://www.pepto-bismol.com/

Went to Europe for the Weekend.....

Well, I'm back from my mini-vacation. The boys and I went to Virginia for the weekend to see Clay at Fort Lee. The perks of having a clean room is getting an off post pass on Saturdays and Sundays. With little warning of Clay's privilege, the boys and I woke early, packed an overnight bag and made the drive north to Virgina. Let me say it is nice to get in the car and drive for less than 3 1/2 hours and be at your destination and have your arms around your husband, rather than driving 20 hours. For me this is a perk.

So, after the boys and I got past the infamous "Gate Nazi" we were on our way to pick up Clay at his company. Finally after waiting for Clay to finish with formation (another word for organized goofing off) we decided on a whim to go to Busch Gardens in Williamsburg for the day. Which was an awesome decision, because the weather was fantastic, oh and the fact that we had our complementary passes for Busch Gardens thanks to the Here's to the Heroes program.

Clay, Chris, Ayden and I had an amazing time together. The boys were able to ride so much more here, than at SeaWorld back in April. We rode the carousel, a roller coaster, a sky ride from Germany to England and lots more fun. The streets of Italy smelled wonderful and Oktoberfest was fun too. It was fun being away for the day, feeling like we were in several different countries.

The boys had a blast at the Forest of Fun, which was the Sesame Street themed area of the park. We got to see Count's Halloween Show, get our picture made with Big Bird, see Elmo, Cookie Monster and Grover. We're not talking about how we saw Abby Cadabby selling smack in her shop there in the Forest of Fun, but Tiffany was right about her. Remember that post awhile back? Sesame Street Characters and their Unhealthy Habits. The boys had a blast, Clay & I drank overpriced beer while listening to bad music in Germany preformed by mummies, ghosts and Frankenstein.

Overall a great weekend together as a family. Clay even got to witness, first-hand the crazy things his boys do while at dinner. A butter knife fight at Olive Garden on Sunday afternoon was the highlight of the trip or was it when our gsp took us to a mall that had been closed down or possibly the 10 mile turnaround somewhere in the Richmond countryside? However, those leaves were pretty.

It was the first time we'd been together as a family in nearly 20 weeks, since the last time we had drove out to see Clay in Texas. He was excited to have a couple of days to relax, feel somewhat normal and spend time with Chris, Ayden and myself. We're counting down the days until he's able to come home and sit in his recliner and not do anything or have to go anywhere. (even if it's just for a brief visit before heading back to school)

Here's to Going Cold Turkey on Wal*Mart Again....

My name isn't Suzanne, but it'll be awhile before I hear:

"You come back and see us, you hear!"

Last year, before I started this blog, while my husband was in BCT (basic combat training) for the Army for 10 weeks, I decided to do something very hard. I gave up Wal*Mart for 10+ weeks, from September until November of 2009. I didn't step foot into a Wally World and the one time I did with my friend Jen, her son overturned the buggy (shopping cart) and got a nasty bruise. We both left without buying anything. My life was stress-free from all the idiots you typically see there and have to deal with while waiting behind them in line.

So here I am again, avoiding Wal*Mart like the black plague. Why again, you may be asking? Well, I recently read a book called "Not Buying It: My Year Without Shopping" by Judith Levine. Let me tell you, I'm so glad I checked this book out from the public library instead of purchasing it. I assumed that this was a book similar in structure to Powell's book "Julie & Julia" where she cooked all the recipes out of Mastering the Art of French Cooking. However, this book was not a guide, a story of overcoming shopping or even a how-to for the typical American family living off a combined income of less than $50,000 a year. Yes, I'd love to have two homes, have 3 vehicles, remodel my winter home and give up my caviar while living a simpler lifestyle of "not buying it", like Levine. This book was a sad disappointment for me to read all the way through and I did finish it, somehow hoping it would get better, but it didn't. Ugh. I thought to myself, that this lady has no idea about really having to "do without" or living paycheck to paycheck like most of us in the real world. Now, I admit that my family does live "comfortably" on our annual income. There are times when it's tight and times when I have extra money in my pocket. But, I am aware of necessity over want or need.

So, I decided to venture out on a limb and eliminate shopping at Wal*Mart again. Note: This has nothing to do with the Wal*Mart corporation, I'm still going to Sam's to buy Pull-ups for my son and to get my favorite bottle of wine for special occasions. This is another experiment to curve unnecessary spending.
Last year, during my 10 week sabbatical from the American superstore, I noticed that I bought only what I needed and didn't overstock on toilet paper or anything else that "seemed" like a good buy at the time. I only shopped at my local grocery store or at Target (a 45 minute trip to the closest one in my area, which limited me to shopping there every 2 weeks) for basic items and groceries. It was refreshing and my life felt less chaotic. So, I'm not trying to "not buy anything" for a year, I'm trying to stop depending on Wal*Mart so much. Think about it, you've ran out of soap or a tube of toothpaste, instead of going down the street to the drug store or grocery store, you venture across town to the dreaded supercenter. That $3.50 purchase has just turned into a $54.26 shopping blunder. A 10 pack of tube socks have recently been reduced from $7.50 to $6.95 and you needed to renew your fishing license while you were there after picking up a clearance item for a birthday gift next month, if you remember where you put it and a few other random items. All the while, you forget to get the toothpaste or soap and come home without it.

I know this has happened to me, has it happened to you?

I'm still slowly adjusting to the "less is more" theory of life and try to remember that things only fill up your living space, not your heart. Yes, I can love the orange cotton sheets that I just bought this morning at Target, but like would be a more appropriate word to use. Did I need the orange sheets? Yes and no. I've wanted orange bed sheets since last January when I started redecorating my bedroom and it's nice to have an extra set of sheets clean to put on the bed in case your 3 year old throws up in bed with you. I didn't have to buy them, but I did.

I'm really going to have to cut back my spending in the next few months and this will be the first of many steps. My family will soon be back together again after a long year of being apart (which is a long story of dealing with the "Hurry Up and Wait" challenges within the Army) and we will be doing our first PCS with the Army. It's going to be a challenge, but I'm up for it and part one is doing with out Wal*Mart until the first of the year. Then on January 1, I will be reevaluating my decision and deciding whether or not to forgo shopping there for the entire year of 2011. My only promise during this time, will be to give you (the reader) an alternative outlook on an adventure from the shoes of an average American trying to do the unimaginable.

Today is the end of week 1 of 12 weeks, wish me luck. :D

UPDATE: Current CNN Headline on Twitter

cnnbrk-U.S. apologizes for infecting Guatemalans with STDs in 1940s. http://on.cnn.com/aKYzyE 16 minutes ago via web

That's the news I'm talking about! Shht.

Take a Walk Down the Street with Me...

This past week I've seen two different clips from season 41 of Sesame Street. And I'm unsure of how I exactly feel about what's going on down the street. Katy Perry ended up on the cutting room floor or rather the rest of her outfit. The other clip "TrueMud" has bounced around the web like wildfire and I thought it at the time it was almost genius. But, now I'm wondering if it really was.

I enjoy parodies as much as the next person, but Sesame Street is stretching it with a HBO TV show parody. You really think the same people subscribing to HBO channels still flip to PBS for the occasionally Antiques Roadshow? Much less tune in to Sesame Street for their children to watch? I don't think so. However, there they were: Sookie, Bill, Sam, Maryann, LaFayette, Arlene, Tara and even Sheriff Bud Dearborne puppets on the set following a opening title sequence for TrueMud. (Way dirtier than the opening of TrueBlood)

I'm not being a grouch, but I was raised on the "Street" watching it religiously as a child, but now it doesn't hold a special place in my heart anymore. As a parent to two boys, I've turned my back on where I was raised and my boys don't watch anything on PBS. They've both seen the few Sesame Street DVDs we've got, but nothing that's been produced in the last 8 years. One morning, I was checking FB on my blackberry before getting out of bed (yeah, my desktop is just for pure blogging now) and came across a WONDERFUL memory of Sesame Street. A friend had posted a link on how crayons were made. I watched it and remembered mornings filled with Super Grover and Mr. Hooper's store. Ayden, my youngest had crawled into bed with me and from the tiny 2x3 inch screen on the BB we were engrossed in awe. "Again, I watch crayons again! " Ayden said and we did.

Ahh memories, sweet memories! Where is the Teeny Little Super Guy and the vintage crayon making videos today on Sesame Street? Where's John-John and Grover counting backwards? Where's Snuffy, Bob and the Twiddle Bugs? Is there a Fix-It Shop on Sesame Street anymore or has it been replaced with a Starbucks or Walgreen's like every other street-corner in America?

So, while I loved Sesame Street and the Muppets growing up, I'm wondering the effect of media will have on our children today. Maybe I'm getting old, (shudder the thought) but why are we so focused on celebrities as opposed to world news or things going right here in America, not just the Jersey Shore. Just two days ago, I received a small 2 sentence tweet on Twitter about four Fort Hood Soldiers committing suicide and I had to type in the search box on CNN to pull up the headline, because everyone was more worried over President Jimmy Carter's case of the BG's (bubbleguts). And what is today's headlines? Oh, they're now focused on questioning JonBenet's brother. WTF? This happened in 1996, 14 years ago this Christmas. Now, I do feel bad about her death, but reopening this case won't bring back that little girl. How about focusing on our current situations at hand? Not Kat Perry's cleavage popping out on Sesame Street or Michelle Obama and Nick Jonas teaming up for fitness. Don't bother yourself with childhood obesity Michelle. It's the childhood brainwashing, name-brand icons and celebrities being implanted in their heads we need to worry about. I'm wondering what the world (or America in this case) is coming to.

Randomness, Again At Its Best……

I recently had an email come through my inbox from the Army entitled “Afghan Wars”. This was the only mental image I could produce at the time. Does anyone else call crocheted blankets "Afghans" or is it just people from the South? And then I thought this picture sent to me was hilarious as well.

Twitter Update- Alright, so I’m completely lost on how the Twitter thing works, but I thoroughly enjoy reading and seeing randomness at its best. I’ve been tweeting for about 3 weeks, okay that’s a lie. I’ve been “reading” tweets and retweets. My personal belief is that Twitter is a fancy way to cyber-stalk famous people and celebrities from a distance that safely harbors you from being slapped with a restraining order or sitting outside their Hollywood home with binoculars around your neck. You know where they are and what they’re doing or how they’re feeling, eating, etc. without all the time consuming legwork of stalking. Plus, this gives the advantage for one to "follow" many people, not just one or two and this is widely accepted by everyone in America who tweets. Scary thought, but oh well.
I have unfollowed @JimCantore (of the Weather Channel). This crap with #Igor and his incessant ramblings on tornados in #Kansas and other weather mumbo-jumbo, frankly I don’t give a damn. However, the tweets of the voice-sexy @mikeroweworks (Mike Rowe of Dirty Jobs) have now filled my twitter page. Ahhh, I can just imagine him doing a voice-over on his tweets to his followers, all 29,326 of us. And my favorite twit-pic of the week.

@mikeroweworks In a jelly bean factory. Quite possibly my favorite homage to Safety Third. Ever. http://twitpic.com/2oihjh

Other honorable mentions of tweeters that I follow are: @celiarivenbark (NC humorist/writer) who hasn’t tweeted since September 09. However, her last tweet was epic and I kept her because of that. @BenFolds (NC native in the music industry) and by gosh keeping him on here forever because of the YouTube clip from a live performance on “Chatroulette” (check it out) at a Charlotte Concert. Again, Bobby you made that concert rock and you too Bam on the can. Yes, this clip was downloaded to my iPod for my in flight entertainment to Texas last April. And last but not least @brettcbailey (renowned social networker in a smallish portion of NC) 95% of his content on Twitter is RT (re-tweets) but still an essential person to follow for your daily laugh or for your need to know info on college sports or NFL football, which I skip over these tweets and read the more pressing issues facing the world today; like some these:
RT@PeterGriffinn I type like this, #becauseimagangsta. yuuhh typ3 lyk3 diz bcuz ur @n id10t.

True. U no? Pardon the interjection of a personal tangent, but bear with me, this is my blog. Or my personal favorite shortened txt word that my husband uses constantly,"caws" not cause. Aggravating, but apparently it's the most time efficient shortcut txt word for our soldiers in the U.S. Army who communicate via BB messenger to find out what time final formation is or to tell their wife they can't talk long "caws tim is short" which translates to "cause time is short". Really? I thought you were saying we can't talk long because your 6 foot father Tim is now short. Okay on to more sweet tweets...

RT@alyankovic On second thought, it actually might behoove you to fear the Reaper a little bit. #rockretractions (I need more Cowbell!)
@brettcbailey I wish Tucker max would come out and punch Chelsea handler right in the ovary. #vma (I wish the same too!)
So, my life is a little bit funnier each day thanks to all the tweeters I follow. It's kind of like those brown bag specials, you never know what you’re going to find inside or read in this case. Happy tweeting for you peeps that do and find me if you can. I'm on to google a video of @mikeroweworks playing a piano and singing at the tannery and download it to my iPod. Maybe, just maybe, Ben and Mike could meet up on day on Chatroulette. Ahh...that would be awesome. :D

Getting Some Chinese Wookie and Fook You Too!

*Warning-The following blog post is non-typical blogging material for me, which may in fact become quite typical for me in the future. Having said that-cover your virgin eyes if you wish not to read the following.*

So, today has been interesting to say the least and some of my conversations on FB have been, how do you say? Slightly suggestive?
Perhaps.
Earlier today I went to the dentist and after sitting next to the lady wearing High Karate, I knew my day would be anything but average. Gagging..I get called back to the room and after a close call with a dental tool (the pointy one with the crooked bend in it) to my left eye, leaving me with my first impressions of the dental assistant and my teeth. Well just read my post.
Me-Just about threw up on a girl named Brett while she was making my impressions. Good impression, huh?
Michelle-That sucks.. Hope it wasn’t smelly & chunky! ~ was that inappropriate?
Me- Very inappropriate, but VERY funny. :D
Glenda-Please tell me you didn't have tuna for lunch :)!

Glenda, I’m afraid not. No tuna, just a hearty bowl of Buffalo Chicken Chili, which was delicious. So that brings me to my afternoon quest for my Cheerwine Fanatic Cousin by marriage-Brynlie. Sad part is she’s from Utah and living on the post-apocalyptic campus of Central Wyoming College and has to get her Cheerwine fix on her visits to the Carolinas. Poor child. So, I’m out “shopping” for Brynlie and getting her some things to “Cheer” her “Wine”y A$$ up out in Wyoming and thus led to an interesting Facebook topic (of course on my behalf).

Bennie and her only love in this world.

So, I married into the best undiscovered family members the other side of the Mississippi. I’ve been married to Clay for going on 8 years and without FB I’d never get to “chat” or catch-up with family that seem so far away. Let’s just say, I am truly blessed to be related to these folks. Now, I have no idea who belongs to who over in Utah; except Punk had her daughter Angie and a few more, Angie begot Ammy & Brynlie and a few more and I’m related by marriage because Punk’s sister Vetis, had Tim and a few others and Tim begot Clay and Rebekah and I married Clay. (Pardon the lack of a family tree diagram) Now maybe it sounds a bit like the book of Genesis, but I believe this is how it went.
Ammy & Brynlie are now two of my favorite people to follow on FB with constant fighting and outward displays of affection that goes on and on and on between the two of them. Many wall-to-wall posts between Ammy & Brynlie have peeked my curiosity of Silver Balls and Chinese Wookie, which lead me to this discussion.

Me- Just had the following conversation-Ok, let me get this straight-no Chinese Wookie but maybe some Fook You.
Me- And for you perverts out there, I was talking with my cousins in Utah about Chinese restaurants.
Lori -lol
Brynlie -I would press like, but it bugs the snot out of you. So instead I will just say I like this. "I like this." (Reading this made my day, someone is actually reading this blog.)
Ammy -We're so awesome lol
Me- Shh. Or everyone will want to be your friend too.

This was derived from the original question to Brynlie …..

Me-What the heck is Chinese Wookie? It's been bothering me for 2 days. I'm thinking a Chewbacca of Chinese ancestry.
Ammy-Nikki, China Wookie is what we call a restaurant here in town called China Wok. The joke is that they make their food out of whatever cats or rodents they find that morning
Brynlie-nasty-ness I tell you, nasty-ness!
Me- Ah. I love some Chinese food. Maybe when I make my pilgrimage to Utah I will venture out for Chinese Wookie!
Brynlie-no, you won't. We would take you to PF Chang's. Not China Wookie.
Ammy-Don't do it! There's a better place I call Fook You because I can't remember the name lol
Ammy-Or PF Chang's, that's muy bueno
Me-Ah classy! Forgive me but what is cwc? Central Wyoming College? Oh wrap it in a Wal-Mart bag! That's how my bestie does it. The blog link is on my info page. Howtoturnanaveragedayintoandadventure.com (I think) Brynlie and I were having a side conversation via inbox and I threw in my reply here.
Brynlie-PF Chang's is the best thing to happen to Chinese food since the invention of the fortune cookie. (which was invented in California) go figure.
Brynlie -Central Wyoming College. You got it. I will send the boys some too. sizes?? (side note-I’ll inbox you those sizes)
Ammy -This little snippet of useless trivia brought to you by Brynlie! Nothing is classy out here, they don't deserve sweet names
Me -I know I read that somewhere. Ok, let me get this straight-no Chinese Wookie but maybe some Fook You. (another side note-I read this in Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader. Guessing my cousins have copies in all of their facilities back home in Utah. No judging-I have a copy in mine.)
Brynlie -first off, Ammy you were watching that documentary with me about Chinese immigrants during the gold rush. Second, Nikki- Fook You is disgusting as well. Might as well chew on rat bung holes. PF's all the way.
Ammy -Ha-ha that's what you eat at the Wookie! I could go for some PF, hurry home I'm hungry now!
Brynlie - Home? I am at home. my home. you know the one where my sister ISN'T tanning the leather sofa and sucking the love out of my mom.

And this continued until the two of them took it over to their own wall and left my wall all alone. Thank goodness for crazy family members without them you'd have nothing to read. Ha.

HELP ME!! It's the worst case of writers block!!

Okay, so I've slacked off. Not a single new post since July....scary I know. But, I've got a serious case of writer's block. Looking for inspiration, I joined.... (drum roll please) **TWITTER!**

Yeah, I know, scary! My Mom set-up one and I just couldn't bare the thought of her being more technologically advanced than me. So, I one up-ed her. I ordered last night's dinner via my crackberry and then joined Twitter. Okay,so will this help with writer's block...IDK, but it's worth a shot. So, I need to get on the ball and begin blogging again...if I have any followers left. Oh and I got an award from Jelly in late July!

Here it is all shiny, now that I've dusted it off.

I just received an award from my good friend Jelly (Kelly)

I am suppose to share 7 things about myself.

Well......

1. It bothers the snot out of me for people to constantly like ALL my status updates on FB. Yeah, I know, it's there for you to read, but come on.

*I like this!* Give me a break!

2. Unlike Kelly, I throw my children in the Wal-mart buggy, never wiping it down. It's called survival of the fittest!

3. I'm addicted to Sirius in the Jeep and Pandora on my crackberry. I love listening to The Doors, The Who, Pink Floyd, Jay-Z, 3!Oh!3, Ben Folds, David Bowie, Led Zeppelin, Usher, Lady Gaga, No Doubt and lots more!

4. I decided that after my birthday this year I will be 29 FOREVER!

5. Speeding tickets-only 2 in 13 years ...(pats self on the back)

6. I play video games everyday. Even if my boys aren't here. :D

7. If I don't have pockets in my pants, my crackberry gets stuck in my bra-left side, the same place the ipod gets put when I run. TMI-but, now you know.

More Random than Kelly's....Thanks! Now to pass this on to some lucky bloggers!

Total Eclipse of the Heart-Broken

So, I went Friday night to see the third installment of “The Twilight Saga-Eclipse”. Disappointment from every angle on this movie; hence the post I made on FB after seeing it.

Nikki -Yes you're hearing this correct: I'm so done with sparkly vampires.
Friday at 11:28pm via Facebook for BlackBerry
View Feedback (10)

Sammi likes this.
Julie-WTH? Say it isn't so!!
Amber-what? did you hit your head when you fell? haha
Jake-Yeah, until the next one comes out.
Beverly-???
Amber-or Jacob fan?
Beverly-The movie was somewhat scattered and editing was terrible..jumped around a lot and I guess since I read the book it did leave some things to wonder....but it was okay.....
Kelly-It's all lies Nikki....I'll pretend u didn't say it!
Stacy-shut your mouth when you talking crazy like that lol
Sammi-likes this!! im not a fan of either, but Jacob is way hotter lol

Yes, I did fall down the stairs in the dark at the theater during the previews; sad enough I couldn’t claim that I was texting and walking when this occurred. Let’s backtrack the evening to 2 hours before the movie and before I had several delicious Strawberry Frescos at Olive Garden with dinner. It was a girl’s night out and this happens very rarely for me. I was taking full advantage of the designated driver and a night out on the town with my sister-in-law and cousin. Here's the DD, Rebekah below.

I was really pumped about this movie and excited to see it. We got our tickets and waited in line until we were directed towards the theater where we would be seeing “Eclipse”. Maybe since I was intoxicated and would view the movie through non-Twilight-crazed eyes, I was more aware of how awfully painful of a movie this was. However, nothing prepared me for this tragedy of epic proportions set before me.
Let’s start with Kristen Stewart.
I recently endured an Indie film from 2004 staring Stewart entitled “Speak”. I should have known I was in trouble after realizing that it was on Lifetime. Painful as this movie was, Stewart’s acting abilities have not improved much at all. She, however, did the whole lip-biting thing through the movie and I sometimes wonder that someone was hired to look for someone that had the exact mannerisms and looked like Bella in the Twilight novels. BAM! Here you go….it’s Kristen Stewart. She looks close enough to the way that Bella is described in the novels and is about to chew a hole through her lip. Never mind the fact that she can’t act, “Twilight” was a low-budget film and a possible box-office flop when it began production. Let’s use her and save money by putting Ashley Greene in as a secondary character. Now that girl has charisma when on-screen. (Don’t even get me on a rant about how much better of an actress Greene is than Stewart.) So, Stewart’s performance as Bella for the THIRD time was just like she did in the first one, but worse. To me, it seemed as if she had to be “carried” by each actor and actress in just about every single scene. Robert Pattinson’s character suffered because they were in about 95% of the movie together. And what the heck was the deal where Stewart didn’t even react when Taylor Lautner threw the wrench in that one scene? A better leading female would help carry the story. *cough* Greene. *cough* Enough with her, for now.
My complaint with Pattinson was the 24/7 look of constipation on his face. It was noticeable in the first 2 films, but this one looked like he was about to drop a deuce at any moment. Could have been due to Stewart’s acting, which is a good possibility. I also had a problem with the story of the 3rd wife, in the book (yes, I read them all) the tribe’s stories take up about six chapters and they condense it down to about 7 minutes in the movie. Why tell the tribe’s story about the 3rd wife and not bring it full circle at the end? Now, for those who haven’t read the book it might have not seemed like a big deal, but it was a pivotal point in the book.
On to cinematography; there’s so much to say, but to sum it up-AWFUL. I took two years of film appreciation in college and while I am no expert in this field, but this movie should never make any list for best picture. The whole film appeared rough; like pieces picked up off the editing room floor and put together. Even the timeline in the movie was off, especially during the end. Alice sees the Volturi coming in a vision and gives the Cullen clan 10 minutes before their arrival. Here comes Dakota Fanning and her entourage strolling through the woods and meeting them within 30 seconds. WTH?
There wasn’t many pro’s I saw with the film other than the classic line of “Does he ever wear a shirt?” and that’s one thing that helped me get through this movie. Cinematography wise they did do an excellent job with the Cullen clan and the Pack running through the woods chasing Victoria and the battle scene at the end. Good supporting actors and actress, notable mentions to Billy Burke (Charlie), Nikki Reed (Rosalie), Xavier Samuel (Riley), Sarah Clarke (Renee) and of course Ashley Greene (Alice) helped this movie move in some direction, no thanks to Constipation Pattinson and Lip-biter Stewart.
With my two cent not put in, I must agree that most any book or novel turned movie will have disappointment, but not to epic proportions. Now, we must all remember that the target audience for the entire “Twilight Saga” is for 14-16 year old girls, it’s not really meant for any other crowd or age group. And with that, I can’t be too harsh with all the problems that I have graciously pointed out, but it’s out there on the table now.

Lesson learned-don’t drink and Twilight, it’s no fun for anyone!

So, I'm following a dream....

Wish me luck everyone. I'm following a dream. I just submitted a piece of mine to a new online military magazine as a contributor. It'll be nice to do something I enjoy. Crossing my fingers! :)

Here it is!

Military life is hard and so is the life of a military spouse. There is no clear cut instruction book to go with it and a lot you have to find out on your own. Whether it’s from books, fellow military spouses, friends, family or turning to your religion, you’ll seek answers from them all. This lifestyle might have not been what you envisioned once your spouse signed on the dotted line or maybe you’re a little late in the game and now are married to someone who was already enlisted. It’s hard being a military spouse and there’s no hiding it.
It might all seem like glitz and glamour when you see the stickers on the backs of mini-vans and SUV’s “Proud Army Wife” or all the hype associated with military, like you’re automatically initiated into a really cool club with a discount card and crazy good insurance. But, let me warn you….it’s not. Military life is an adventure, one that you might not be ready for. Especially if you are used to know the: who, what, when and where ahead of time. The military moves on its own time and that’s just lesson number one.

So stinking excited.....

Well, back to blogging. So, the last post was on our family going Wheat & Dairy Free....and so much has changed since then. Not with the GF/CF (gluten-free/casein-free) diet that the A-train is on, but with our family. Off-topic: Check out this picture of the A-train feeding a baby calf at the farm last week. He even got to milk Mabel the cow while he was there!So, I took a break from blogging, Clay came home the second week of May, then I had to get back in the swing of things again without him being around and both boys had field trips the following week.Clay had a good week of R&R and spent some much needed time with the boys. They were so happy to have their Daddy home, even if it was just for the week. AND-I just found out today that we've got a date for Clay to be re-classed to a different MOS. WOOHOOO! So things are moving right along and Clay might actually be done with AIT before his year anniversary in the Army. I’m excited and I know that Clay is too. Other than that, Chris has about 8 more days of school, 3 therapy sessions left for Ayden and the entire summer for the three of us to have fun! I’ve got to start planning Chris’ FIFTH birthday which is in July. WOW time flies!

All for One and One for All.....

Our family has recently undergone a dietary change to be Wheat-Free and Dairy-Free (for one month, until Ayden's next doctor's visit) to help and see if it alleviates some of his developmental delays. It's all for one and one for all around here at our house. We're doing this together to make it easier on Ayden. I've read a lot on the topic and even his doctor says that changing his diet should make a difference. So, far he's getting frustrated with normal things and not his laid back self. He's also pointing and trying to use words to express himself for the first time. It's progress and I remain hopeful that it's as simple as changing what we eat.

For starters, I cleaned out the pantry, the cabinets, freezers (big and little) and the fridge of all things containing wheat or dairy. That left me eating guacamole and Frito's for dinner that night. And here we are approaching the end of week two...it's been interesting. We haven't starved, but I've gotten really creative in the kitchen.

Another plus to this new dietary change, I haven't had any yucky, bloating feelings and lots of energy. (Maybe all that wheat expands in your belly, making you feel all fat and gross?) Also, that cuts out 98% of eating out (YAY!) there are very few places that Ayden can eat at outside of home and daycare. By the way, his daycare has amazed me with the questions and dedication they have to help me out to figure out if these foods are making Ayden delayed.

KUDOS to you Miss Heidi and Miss Ann!

So, we have NO BUTTER in our house, just Vegan sticks of a butter substitute...Earth Balance Vegan Buttery Sticks. There's NO CHEESE, just Vegan Gourmet Cheese Alternatives. And lastly, NO MILK, (yep!) we've done soy milk before, but we've discovered ALMOND MILK! Oh and then there's the NO WHEAT thing...yeah, wheat is in EVERYTHING!

I had a bare pantry 2 weeks ago, but now it's nice and full of wheat-free/dairy-free items and it's a place that I can feel good knowing that I can prepare foods for Ayden that will help him meet his goals and if not, well...there's no harm in continuing this diet. We all know that processed foods contain so many chemicals that aren't found in "nature" nor are they "all-natural".

Do we really know what we're feeding our children?

It's Going to be Like a Fat Guy in a Little Coat......

So, I just finished another wonderful book. I've been curled up on the couch the past few days reading this book I picked up at the library last week. I've read so many wonderful books lately, but this one just took me back about 50+ years to a time when things were a whole lot more simple and no day to day distractions (like Facebook or e-mail.) It was set during the pre-war era 1960's, when you called your friends and neighbors on their home phone and played bridge on Mondays at noon. Sounds like fun, but I've never played bridge, however I might want to learn. I began thinking about how our lives are cluttered with unnecessary things and appointments that we dread. I'm hoping that one day, I can live by the words:

Less is More.

I'm not sure how to exactly go about this, but I've started de-cluttering my life and have begun thinking of all the things we hang on to for memories. Simple things like decorations, art made by our little ones, things I made as a child or something that a family member made before they passed away. I'm all for keeping their memory alive, but if I accumulate much more, I'm going to need another house.

So, I'm trying to get to a place where I don't need the object for the memory. Or latch on to it, because it once belonged to a great-third-cousin twice removed who found it at a local flea market and thought it would look perfect on their mantel and willed it to me or my husband. Because in fact, we don't have a mantel to place it on. Our family is also to the point where we know it's not going to be much longer before we PCS with the Army to our duty station. Now, I know how "roomy" the base housing can be. Let's just say I'll be lucky to fit a queen bed, dresser and two nightstands in the master bedroom. It's going be like the fat guy in a little coat getting all of our stuff in there.

Where does this leave me?

With a house full of stuff that I CAN'T get rid of, because it's perfectly good and someone would throw a fit to know that I passed it along to someone else. It's just like that crystal serving dish Clay & I received 7 1/2 years ago as a wedding present that I've yet to serve from. (Well, maybe I should hang on to it, you know for the my bridge club on Mondays at noon. So, I can serve tea sandwiches and deviled eggs off of it with my silver service.) Thank God that we didn't register for fine china when we got married. I'm partial to my clear dishes and Smurf glasses for entertaining.

However, I have an idea to solve my problem. I'll just go through one room at a time and just think to myself "If this ________ was really important or useful to me, it wouldn't be in a box, under the cabinet, stuffed in the closet in the office, etc." I'm spring cleaning and it's all going. I'm going to follow my own advice.....

If I haven’t enjoyed it, seen it, touched it or worn it in the last 6 months or going to in the next 6 months, it’s gone. However, there are two exceptions to this rule: my skinny clothes in the closet and my Husband! (deployments are 12 to 15 months long) Goodbye Clutter!

~excerpt from previous blog entry: Trying to Go from Semi-Hoarder to Semi-Simple.

I received an Award!

I just received the "Honest Scrap" award from my good friend Jelly. (you know Jelly & Kake)

Thank you so much for this lovely award! It is such an honor to receive this for my blog. *tear*

The deal is that I give you 10 random facts about me:

1. I recently bought $175 worth of books off Amazon.com last week. I have read all of them, but wanted them to in hardback for my library that I'm building.

2. Our family has recently undergone a Wheat-Free/Dairy-Free diet to see if this helps eliminate some of Ayden's (my youngest) developmental delays. Needless to say, this has been interesting finding foods without wheat or dairy in them.

3. I'm working on my Bucket List. I have a feeling that it will be a work in progress.

4. I'm trying to workout on my Wii (Wii Fit Plus) everyday. ~Clay would be proud.

5. The last time I slept beside my husband all night long was on January 1st 2010.

6. I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up.

7. I love to cook. I'm the happiest when I create something delicious to eat!

8. I don't wear a lot of make-up or none at all most of the time, because it makes me feel fake.

9. I like to dance and I sing out loud in the car when no one is with me, except for Ayden (he sings too!)

10. Thinking that I need to have a weekend getaway with Jelly and go to an amusement park and ride some rollercoasters with her. (Adding that to the Bucket List!)

Now to pass this award on to....

Attending the Battle of Who Could Care Less?

Where do I begin....

Do you never rest?

Fighting the battle of who could care less?

Unearned unhappiness...

That's all right I guess...

I can feel that something's not right. I can feel that someone's blasting me with hate and bass. Sending dirty vibes my way. It wasn't my idea. It wasn't my idea. It never was my idea. Look who's telling who what to do. I don't get many things right the first time, in fact, I am told that a lot. Now I know all the wrong turns, the stumbles and falls brought me here.

Kiss my a$$..

goodbye...

I'm pissed off, but I'm too polite.

The b*tch went nuts, she started talking politics in front of all my bosses and bullshit from the internet. The b*tch went nuts....cause I'm rocking the suburbs.

*Ben Folds thank you for amazing song lyrics.

It's Lellow and We're Going to Taksas!

My niece Grace (my sister Julie’s daughter) is 4 and just outright hilarious. She comes up with some random stuff sometimes, like zombies and Michael Jackson. If you ask her, she’ll tell you all about Michael Jackson..”He died.” She says lellow instead of yellow. But to hear her talk with her southern accent is a sight to behold. She brings a smile to my face when she has a conversation with me (very seriously with her hands on her hips).

I read the cutest thing yesterday on FB.

Julie's Wall-to-Wall with Clay

Grace: " I had a dream about Uncle Clay lasterday."
Me: "Oh, really?"
Grace: "He was coming from back Taksas. And his sweater was choking him."
You like this.
Clay: Omg hilarious. That is sweet.

Even funnier, because I’ve never seen Clay in a sweater the 11 ½ years we’ve been together. Maybe I need to tell Grace next time we talk that we're going to Taksas and looking for the Lellow Rose!

And these are the Days of Our Lives…..

This might turn into a weekly "special" blog post. Poor Tiff in Texas, her new ArmyWife life is more interesting than a soap opera on NBC. So…this week’s story is about Merton, C.C. and Hershey. Merton is an athletic 60 year old male who is married to C.C. a 43 year old woman who is a chronic chain-smoker since the age of 3, who bore them a child named Oh Henry. Oh Henry is 15 months old and enjoys playing on the jungle gym at the park nearby. Hershey a strapping 38 year old maintenance man who works at The Willows Apartment complex to help support his gambling habit of Texas Hold'em.

Tiffany: Todd why are you dragging me into the bathroom?
Todd: (whispering, his face beat red and out of breath from running) Our neighbor C.C. is having an affair with Hershey the maintenance man. That child of hers is really his, not Merton’s. I overheard them talking in the hall, they didn’t see me, but I believe that I know something that I’m not supposed to.
Tiffany: (hitting Todd on the shoulder) And you’re involving me in this….because?
Todd: Ouch…you’re here all day and he fixes things at the apartment.

Meanwhile…
Back in FacebookLand, I've never laughed so hard until I heard Tiffany tell me all about the love affair between the Crazy Cat Lady and the Maintenance Man at her apartment complex.

Nikki-Just wait...it's going to be great! My muse is back.....I'm still laughing at picturing Todd's face trying to tell you the juicy gossip from down the hall.
Tiffany-Oh my God! It was soooo funny!

Oh and of course, I'll share my blonde moment on FB for the day.

Tiffany- According To Nikki I'm so exhausted because I'm having "Octagons"! LoL!!! Thankful for my friend who always knows what to say to make me laugh! :o)
Nikki- Well what do you call it? Give me a break! I had a long workout at the gym, two kids in the backseat and random people asking if I needed a tire change all because I was sitting at the end of the road so I wouldn't lose service while talking on the phone with you! :P

I believe congratulations are in order for Tiffany and her "Octagons"! I'm so happy for you! :)


(BTW-I got the name Hershey from a real maintenance man that works at the hospital I used to.)

Just stopping by to make a purchase....

It's been an incredibly LONG week....and it's only Monday. I've had a lot going on the last few weeks...... planning Ayden's 3rd birthday, planning for my first airplane ride with the boys (solo), planning our trip to San Antonio, worrying that my husband's Fit for Duty will be scheduled before we get to Texas (that's a whole other can of worms), getting Ayden transferred to the school system for his therapy to continue after his 3rd birthday, Chris being asked to be in a friend's wedding this summer as the ring bearer and then dealing with the daily duties of a housewife. It's been crazy around here. Sometimes, I feel like I've bit off more than I can chew at times, but I'm still sane and I've been keeping up with what's going on.

Then to top this feeling of being slightly overwhelmed, Chris brought home papers in his backpack today for Kindergarten Registration. I broke down...just because he's my first child (he's gotten so big, so fast) and then I realize,

"Are we even going to be living in NC come August?"

I don't even know where to begin, other than just planning like we will be here come August. Military Installations are used to dealing with kids transferring during the school year, but will I?

So, I'm just going to stop by the paddle store before I head upstream and pray for the best. :)

Job Seeking...Look No Further!

If you don't mind having

4 slimy co-workers

and a boss that is a real rat,

this might be your dream job!

Blogging at it's very best!

This is going to be great....blogging on the go! Coming soon.

Crazy Things to Dream About.....

I must be worried about my friend Tiffany. I had a dream about her last night. I had this crazy dream about me calling to warn her in the middle of the night. I was screaming "Wake up! There's a strange lady at your door!" Tiffany opens the door with her cell phone in hand and then she begins beating the bejesus out of the strange lady with a Buzz Lightyear toy with the other hand. If I were psychic, I would believe that this is the cue for Tiffany and her family to move to on-post housing. I guess I fear for her safety from the Crazy Cat Lady in the apartment complex. By the way- this dream was not drug induced, just a random weird and crazy dream.

Things in Life that give me the Heebie-Jeebies....

In no particular order,

these are somethings that just down right frighten me.

Clowns-I don't like them.

Stephen King movies-he's a weirdo.

Cameltoes-they're just not right in so many ways.

El Caminos-plain yucky.

Vans with Paintings on the side-aka "Rape Wagons" playing

"Chevy Van" by Sammy Johns. Creepy.

FannyPacks-no need to elaborate.

Mom Jeans-SNL did a great job to promote sales.

(click above for advertisement)

Scary things you can't see in movies-

like any movie made my M. Night Shyamalan

PeopleofWal-Mart.com-just scary and not enough words to explain.

Jack Hanna's teeth-as pointed out by Tiffany.

Yucky-Yellow Crusty Toenails-so gross.

Letting a body part hang off the bed-

because something under the bed will get me.

And if I lived in Texas.......

Chupacabras-The goat suckers

Jeepers Creepers...where'd you get those peepers?

Giddy Up Oom Poppa Omm Poppa Mow Mow!

I've Had Another Celebrity Run In...Yes, it's true. I saw Elvira!

Friday night, while dining at a local Pizza Hut with my sister, niece and my two small children, we had a celebrity sighting. We were in awe at the Mistress of the Dark and the path her life has took. I never thought that I'd get see another celebrity in public, but it was pure luck.

I took a poll on Facebook to find out which celebrities some of my friends met. I learned that everyone gets lucky meeting a celebrity from time to time. Just like my Facebook friends and their neat stories:

Cindy- Ron Howard :) I waited on him at the Village Tavern.

Stacy-Joe Nichols at the BBQ festival a few years ago.

Karen- Tom Cruise- I provided EMS coverage when he rented Charlotte Motor Speedway to practice driving for Days of Thunder.

Angela-Evil Kneivel, he called for room service, hot dogs and when he said who he was I said, yeah right... I was wrong!

Annie-me
Julie-Annie & George Clooney
Tim-Jerry Reed, played a show with him in Morganton a few years ago with the Fox Brothers.
Ellie-John Major -you might say 'who?' but he was prime minister of Great Britain at the time! I played guitar for him! Oh and the Duchess of Kent...

Nikki-Wow Guys! Tim-Did you play "East Bound and Down" with him?

Tim-No but we were "loaded up and bussin'" lol. I played with the Fox Brothers and we played first. Jerry's band played next. It was an awesome night. Big crowd too!

Tiffany-I've met Neal Mccoy, John Cena, Eddie Guerrero (Before he died), but my favorite was Charlie Daniels!!!
Seth-Drew Carey, Mimi, Serena Williams, Keyshawn Johnson, Sid Vicious. Mike Tyson, Charlie Daniels, Paul Brandt....

Lori- Lanie Pope...WXII NEWS 12 LOL

I also remember hearing the tales of Celebrity sighting from other friends. My friend who saw Rick Flair in the Charlotte-Douglas Airport one time, and my husband's friend Carl was a cousin to Michael Jordan (I think that's what he told us.), my friends Brian and Dan (both were in the Human Blender 2001 from the video last week) stalked Andy Griffith's home in Manteo when we were living in Rodnathe. (Yes, I had several nights in Rodanthe...minus wild horses that far south on the coast, it just doesn't happen.) Dan & Brian got past the gate and returned to tell us all the tale of the dangling green bean from the shirtless Matlock and that he attended Mount Olivet UMC in Manteo. Or the time, my sister Julie went to the Extreme Home Makeover going on in our hometown last November, met Jewel and her husband(the rodeo star, who's name no one can ever remember) and even grabbed Ty's butt.

In this picture,Julie is standing next to Ty (in the cream colored shirt) and we can't see her left hand, can we? Look at the dude's face, something is clearly going on back there. So celebrity run-ins happen quite frequently to people I know. My brother Josh, has met Richard Petty, my friend Amber has met so many rock stars, I don't know where to begin, but she met Gwen Stefani (awesome), Clay's Aunt Merritt has met Obama and about every Democrat in D.C. in the last 5-10 years(Wow, if you're into politics, which I'm not). My cousin Jamie rode in an elevator with an Olsen twin while in NY, Clay has met Chris Weinke (former FSU & Charlotte Panther's football player), other Panther players, most of WWE wrestlers (he has something in common with Tiffany), Chocolate Myers (some racing guy we talked while in Big Lots), Chris Daughtry, and even Vanilla Ice. Clay met the lengendary college football coach, Bobby Bowden. I've ran into (literally) Eric Montross in Wal-Mart and while I was wearing the shoes that Mugsy Bogues signed. I've met Richard Childress (who, by the way is a very unattractive man), Bob Timberlake (an NC artist), and even looked at the same DvD section while standing next to Dale Jr. in the Concord Mills Mall (but, Clay met him at a bar). But, Elvira has topped the list, replacing my autographed picture of John Travolta. Elvira has changed in the past few years, but here she is still..........

Giddy Up Oom Poppa Omm Poppa Mow Mow

My Heart's on Fire For You!

This picture really doesn't give you the full effect of a celebrity encounter, but it WAS her, complete with hair & make-up, my sister and I were in shock. I really wish I would have taken several pictures, but you know camera phones just don't snap that quick. If we've just seen Elvira, could Elvis be next on our list? Until next time, happy celebrity sightings!